I can't even begin to tell you how much I have experienced the past few months!!
I guess I would just like to tell you how much God has been moving in my life. Just a few things He has done in me include teaching me to control my emotions, training me up as a leader, opening my eyes to who He created me to be, instilling a passion for Him that is uncontrollable and showing me things inside of myself that He wants to focus on and have me grow in.
As you can imagine, this is a lot.
I have also gone through the process of getting accepted to stay a second year at the Honor Academy. I am still waiting on the decision for the second program I tried out for.
This is basically what happened.
I went down Core Advisor (CA) roads. Roads is the process one must go through to test them and see if they would be a good fit for the specific program they are trying for.
I was not accepted. In fact, nobody was, except for one girl that was not even planning to stay. She, along with many others, went down the road just for the growing experience. So at that point, leadership accepted an August intern from the class that just graduated this past August. She was still here, staying in the Management Associate program. So this January, she will be switching from an MA over to a CA.
After I was not accepted to be a CA, I decided to go down mini-roads (the same process but shorter and less intense) to become a Management Associate instead.
Definitions...
CA= Core Advisor= A second year intern in the Honor Academy that is placed over a group (core) of same gender first year interns to directly mentor and lead during their year.
Their primary focus is their core's development and well being.
MA= Management Associate= A second year intern who primarily works behind the scenes to advance the vision of Teen Mania as well as gaining real life experience and self development.
Their primary focus is armor bearing for the ministry and preparing themselves for life outside of the ministry.
So there you go :)
God did an amazing work in me when I was not accepted to be a core advisor and I now realize that He used that process to show me so much about myself. I understand where I am at in life so much better now, and I am okay with being in the stage of life that I am in. Where as before, I was trying to speed up the process and skip this stage so I could get right into the thing that I believe God has called me to. Let me explain.
My vision is for women. I know God has called me to be a voice to young women all over America; to show them what it means to be a disciple of Jesus and a woman at the same time. I want them to know their identity, as a woman, in Christ. As well as the crucial position we hold as women in this world.
If I were a core advisor, I would have a group of young women to directly influence every single day. This would give me the perfect opportunity to follow the calling I believe God has placed on my life and the passion He has instilled in my heart. There's only one problem.
I need to be a product of my message before I can preach it.
In one of our classes, we are studying the phases a developing leader goes through as God leads them to the place He wants them to reach with their life.
The first phase includes leaving home, and obviously coming to know the Lord.
Well, I have moved to Texas...that's pretty far from Home! (UT)
And I have known the Lord since March of 2005.
First phase- Complete.
The second phase is called Inner-life Growth. This phase is where God is primarily working IN you and not as much through you.
The third phase is called Ministry Maturing, where God begins to work through you more and more.
The fourth and fifth phase is where God brings you to the peak in your life and completion of your calling.
Being in the Honor Academy, I am in a mixture of phase 2 and 3. Being developed within myself as well as being worked through by doing the work of the ministry.
What God revealed to me, by my not getting accepted to be a CA, is that I have not spent enough time or focus on phase two. I wanted to completely skip it, and jump into phase three with both feet. Yes, I have a part of my life in phase three, but the part of me that is still in phase two needs to remain there until God is finished.
The Lord has so much to teach me and so much to do in me that could be hindered by me being a CA. So that is why I am so eager and excited to be an MA, instead.
My focus would not be on a group of young women, which is my heart, but I'm simply not at the point in my life, self-development, and relationship with Jesus where I am ready to pursue beginning the ministry God has placed in me. Although there will be an overflow and I will speak into ladies lives as often as they allow me, I will not be distracted from my own development.
After all, how can I teach and mentor others about what God has put in my heart if I haven't even fully understood and lived it out for a good amount of time? In addition, I'm sure there is much more that I need to learn to add to my vision... We'll see :)
I am so excited to see what exactly I am going to learn and I can't wait for the continuance of phase two :)
That is all. :)
No comments:
Post a Comment